Impostor syndrome: why people feel like frauds?
You have worked hard, achieved several milestones, and even received validation from others. But deep down, you feel like it’s all a fluke. Every success feels temporary, every compliment misplaced, and there’s a nagging fear that one day, people will eventually find out you are not as competent as they think. If this sounds familiar, then you might be dealing with the impostor syndrome! It is a result of social pressures and feelings of exclusion.
In today’s day and age, it feels so important to belong to a community that values achievement, even at the expense of your emotional and mental health well-being. Having such feelings and thoughts can be detrimental to a person’s self-worth and self-esteem. The fact is that these thoughts of not feeling enough or being a fraud aren’t always rational or justified by your actual achievements. Yet, their impact can be paralysing.
The term ‘impostor syndrome’ was coined in 1978 by clinical psychologists who observed that many of their clients, who were high-achieving women, had an internal experience of intellectual phoniness. They simply did not feel that they deserved their accomplishments. Just to be clear, impostor syndrome is not a mental health disorder, but it can be associated with anxiety, stress, depression, and other behavioural health concerns.
Now that we have answered what impostor syndrome is, it is also important to understand if impostor syndrome is really even a syndrome or is it just another cool word coined by millennials and Gen Z.
Is it even a syndrome or just lingo?
One of the biggest debates around impostor syndrome is whether it should even be called a syndrome at all. The term suggests a medical or clinical condition, but in reality, impostor syndrome is more of a psychological pattern rather than a diagnosable disorder. Because of this, some prefer alternative terms like impostor complex, impostor phenomenon, or more recently, impostor feelings. However, just because it lacks a medical label doesn’t mean the experience isn’t real.
For those who struggle with it, the feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy can be overwhelming. In fact, simply discovering that this is a recognised experience can be relieving. “Wait! This is actually a thing? Other people feel this way, too? I thought it was just me!” Such thoughts come to play, and you feel like there is a community out there having similar feelings and fighting similar thoughts. You realise you are not alone in this.
The idea of suffering from impostor syndrome is up for debate. Some people experience impostor feelings (see what I did there?) yet continue to take action, pursue their goals, and refuse to let self-doubt hold them back. However, the real struggle begins when these thoughts lead to self-sabotage, often without realising it. When impostor feelings stop progress, create a sense of not belonging, or fuel silent anxiety over being found as a fraud, suffering becomes an accurate description.
For many, impostor syndrome isn’t just occasional doubt, it’s a persistent mental barrier that affects confidence, decisions, and overall well-being.
How do you know if you have imposter syndrome?
Let’s go through a quick checklist and see what score you get.
Self-doubt
When you constantly tend to doubt your abilities and skills, even when there is clear evidence of adequacy in front of you. You may have a constant fear that you will be exposed. This continuous self-doubting will make you feel like a failure.
Fear of failure
Being overwhelmed by the mere thought of failure to a point where it prevents you from taking on any new opportunities or trying something new.
Downplaying success
Discounting your successes and finding excuses to minimise your accomplishments is another cue to having impostor syndrome. Downplaying success can erode your self-esteem completely.
Struggling to accept praise
If you struggle to accept compliments and words of affirmation, in anything and everything you do. Positive remarks are often side-lined by intrusive thoughts.
Comparing yourself
Constant comparison with others over their success against yours, even when you are doing well in your own life. You feel inferior to others and that impacts your self-esteem.
Anxiety
When you have ongoing anxiety related to your day-to-day performance, be at work, or at home. The fear of being exposed as a fraud continues to persist.
Luck factor
Constantly attributing all your wins to luck or just good timing can diminish your self-esteem; it can also make you believe you can’t actually do these things with your skills and abilities.
The perfectionism spell
Overall, if you feel you have most of the above factors in your life, you have a high chance of having impostor syndrome. However, the susceptibility to feeling like a fraud could stem from one big issue: perfectionism.
For many, impostor syndrome stems from perfectionism. It’s a deep-seated fear of failure or not meeting high expectations. At its core, perfectionism is often rooted in early criticism, typically from parents or influential authority figures like principals, teachers, and relatives in the family during childhood. Family pressure can play a key factor in the development of perfectionist tendencies, emphasising that these patterns frequently take shape in one’s formative years.
Overcoming perfectionism requires shifting your perspective to accept that doing a task well-enough is just as valuable as doing it flawlessly. Perfectionists must acknowledge that true perfection is unattainable and gradually introduce small imperfections into their lives to become more comfortable with them. In summary, it is much like breaking a habit, the process requires gradual adjustment and patience.
How can you help yourself?
An effective strategy that therapists recommend, left, right, and centre, for managing impostor syndrome is practicing mindfulness. By focusing on daily tasks rather than fixating on the bigger picture, you can prevent feelings of overwhelm. Staying present in the moment helps reduce the anxiety that comes from constantly worrying about the future. Getting sucked into the impostor syndrome and feeling like a fraud is a dangerous territory. However, here are a few steps that you can take to overcome these feelings:
Acknowledge and understand your emotions
The first step to overcoming any challenge in life is to confront it directly. It is hard, but recognising that feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy do not define your true abilities is essential. Once you recognise these thoughts for what they are, you strip off their influence over your emotions.
Shift your perspective from negative self-talk
No one is harder on you than yourself. The next time a wave of self-doubt washes over you, ask yourself, “Would I ever say this to someone I care about?” If the answer is no, this inner criticism is likely unfair and unnecessary. We often impose unrealistic expectations on ourselves while offering kindness and encouragement to others. Challenge these damaging thoughts by analysing their inaccuracy and intentionally choosing to focus on positive aspects or opportunities instead.
Build a support system and seek guidance
You don’t have to navigate these feelings in isolation. Many people, even those who seem confident on the surface, struggle with impostor syndrome in both their personal and professional lives. Finding a community of like-minded individuals who understand your experience can be a source of strength and validation. Engage in mentorship programmes, professional networks, or simply open up to trusted friends and colleagues. You’ll be surprised by how many share your feelings and can offer valuable reassurance.
Acknowledge and appreciate your achievements
When you’re constantly raising the bar for yourself, it’s easy to overlook your wins. Rather than rushing to your next goal, take a moment to recognise and appreciate your successes as they come. Maintaining a record of your achievements — big or small — can serve as a powerful reminder when self-doubt resurfaces. Lastly, remind yourself that your triumph stems from effort and skills, not chance.
Stand up for yourself in the workplace
Impostor syndrome often leads to excessive modesty, which can hold back career growth. For years, societal norms have encouraged women to be humble and reserved, and when combined with self-doubt, it can make advocating for oneself difficult. Remind yourself that your contributions matter, and put this into action — whether it’s by taking rightful credit for your work, confidently sharing your expertise, or putting yourself forward for new opportunities like promotions or leadership roles.
In today’s world of relentless competition, where the pressure to be “the best” is stronger than ever, impostor syndrome finds the perfect breeding ground. We are constantly expected to perform, achieve, and outshine, both professionally and personally. The need to be perfect at all times is not just exhausting, it’s unsustainable. But here’s the truth: perfection is an illusion, and chasing it only fuels self-doubt.
Instead of measuring success by society’s standards or someone else’s timeline, take a step back and define it on your terms. Pause, reflect, and focus on progress rather than unattaining perfection. While it might raise eyebrows and get people questioning your thoughts and way of life, you can rest assured that it will bring you relief, happiness, and newfound joy in life.
You are not alone when it comes to feeling like an imposter, and acknowledging it is the first step towards overcoming the issue. The real victory is not in being flawless; it’s in embracing growth, resilience, and showing up as your most authentic self.
